In the midst of these last couple of weeks since the Montana trip I’ve been down. The referee has been counting and at last check I think he/she was at “6” and I was content to lie there and let life get the KO. I think I’ve been looking at the juggernaut as a whole entity needing to be conquered all at once. Get everything done ASAP and do it well. This line of thinking is only a pathway to despair and feeling hopeless.
I must have caught a moment of clarity sometime yesterday. I turned the whole burden to my higher power and am now getting back to seeing that it’s doing the little things. One right action at a time that will lead to peace ALONG THE WAY. What do I need to do? I need to:
- Trust in my HP
- Execercise regulary, a two mile run plus 30 minutes of lifting, 4ish days a week keeps the positive energy up
- Think in terms of and take actions, just acknowledge feelings and bumps along a greater path.
- Eat better, eat less, try not to stress or binge eat. Admittedly, I think I could have laid in bed all weekend and eaten double fudge cookie dough blizzards…it’s a good think Dairy Queen doesn’t deliver.
- Make the effort to connect with people.
- Laugh. A lot. Setting up a Louis C.K. station on Pandora takes care of this usually.
- Love. A lot. Through actions. “We take the actions of love to improve our connection with others”
- Forgive myself when I falter, but keep chipping away. That helmet always comes off the Juggernaut eventually (in keeping with the X-Men metaphor) and then I’ll have a moment of victory before the next battle.
Enough rambling. Lot’s of little steps to take before I get on a plane for Portland in two days!