My brain is struggling. There’s so much going on right now before entering the US Thanksgiving break. I’m having a hard time concentrating on any one thing, leaving me feeling scattered with a hint of hopelessness as I try to rally against the hurried pace of the holiday clock.

There’s a whole host of things that are causing me priority paralysis and have me wanting to shut down, lock the doors and be a hermit until spring. The list is fraught with deadlines and timelines and being pulled any which way.

  • There’s the workstuff
    • Nebulous deadlines and a push to get things done have brought me into work for only a few hours to ensure stuff doesn’t stray too far from critical paths
    • There’s the manuscript I’m working on for publication in an academic (physics/materials/devices) journal that I want to get submitted by the end of the year. This is on no critical path, but I caught a good stride in working on it and am frustrated at losing that.
    • I was planning on taking time from work this week. Instead I worked extra late yesterday
    • I need to book a trip to San Francisco/San Jose. Our travel booking person is out.
    • Still haven’t gotten reimbursement from my last trip (my corporate card decided not to work…)
    • Trying to get a government proposal written
    • Trying to get a customer proposal written
  • Thanksgiving is tomorrow.
    • I have agreed to make the sweet potato casserole
    • I need to meet my ex halfway between here (Minneapolis) and Milwaukee to get my kids tomorrow morning to be at my sister’s around noon for dinner. We got a good dump of snow which is now making that drive potentially treacherous as it moves through Wisconsin.
    • Frankly I’m tired of family shit at the moment. The last thing I need is for my mom to ask me how my house renovation is coming along in THAT tone. Or (a new insultish thing) my sister wanting me to dress up as santa because my belly qualifies me for that role >:|
  • Dating dilemmas
    • I’m declared non-exclusive, but there are two amazing women who I’m connecting with more than others.
    • Had an amazing weekend with one, however wasn’t able to get anything done.
      • Having some hindsighted resentment about that
      • Need to work on better boundaries
    • Other person lives closer and I seem to connect with her more intellectually.
    • Both want to see me tonight, I need to get the sweet potatoes done.
    • Would like time for some more first dates
  • Weekend travel
    • Flying to Chicago on Friday with my mom and my kids to see Hamilton on Friday night, shop Saturday and fly home Sunday
    • Need to do laundry and pack
    • Maybe can do manuscript work while kids sleep?
    • Square money situation away for the trip/shopping the Miracle mile.
  • Other crap
    • Still need to add my new (to me) car to my insurance
    • Lean pay period based just on how the paychecks fall versus bills
    • Put up Christmas lights
    • I’ll never have time to take over the world, or at least achieve rock stardom
    • My basement still isn’t finished

I guess I’ll live. I needed to make this list to give myself some levity. The reality is I’m thinking too far ahead about too many things. I just need to make a short schedule, turn down my brain a little and stick to that script. So to simplify, I’m removing all the non-schedule based things. From work here I’ll:

  1. Get the couple of things tested that I needed to test and leave.
  2. Make the sweet potatoes, I already bought the ingredients, although I think I need butter.
  3. Pack a small overnight bag and go see datee #1 for a little bit, no sex, just some cuddles and joking around.
  4. Check in for Friday flight (on Southwest airlines) to try to get the best boarding group.
  5. Go over to and crash with datee #2 who is a little bit into Wisconsin (YAY!, a small win shaving 30 minutes off of my morning drive into the bowels of the state). There will likely be amazing sex, as usual.
  6. Get the kids by 10 am.
  7. Swing by my house to pick up casserole and head to my sister’s (maybe I can set a timer for this to get it warm? Option 2, bring completed casserole to my sister’s tonight so they can put it in the oven?)
  8. get home from dinner and do load of laundry and get packed with the kids.
  9. Go to Chicago, hopefully not run away from mom/kids.
  10. Perhaps a couple PTO days on the other end of the weekend?

Whew! Now just stay centered and I can do this.